When a car has been in an accident, although a part of it has been damaged, you can take it in for repairs and it will come back looking good as new. In order to ensure that the repairs to your car are of the best standard you need to to take it to the mechanics of the car manufacturer. Many people take their cars to cheap mechanics which results in poor repairs and experts are able to see where it was hit when you try to sell it later on. Sometimes a car is declared “Damaged, beyond repair”. This means that no matter what mechanics do, the car cannot be fixed and is therefore discarded.
I have never heard of a man being referred to as damaged goods so excuse me if this post is focused on women who are damaged goods. Unfortunately for us, Society tends to criminalise our sexuality. A woman who is referred to as damaged goods is discarded of by society. She is scrapped like an asset which no longer has any value, as if her value was rooted in her sexuality to begin with. *sigh*
In many communities a woman who is not a virgin when she gets married, is damaged. Her worth is depleted. As a result many women find themselves in a position where they are ashamed of admitting that they are not virgins. Virginity which is more often than not defined by the breaking of one’s hymen. I point that out because the scary thing is among these women who are ashamed of their “non-virgin” status there are women who did not have a choice in the matter. Women who were raped, whose virginity was stripped from them. Her hymen broke when she was raped, did she lose her virginity if it was not her decision to have sex? Will anyone listen? Will they care? Bottom line is she’s been labelled: Damaged Goods.
“She’s damaged goods. Used up. Nobody wants her anymore. Every man you can think of has had his share of that pie. She’s a walking talking disease.” I’m guilty. Of saying things that resemble this statement. I have heard about girls and their sex scandals, stuck my nose in the air, labelled them and moved on. “Damaged goods, loose girl, sies”. I have blatantly disregarded the individual or considered that their behaviour could be a symptom of an underlying pain. Forgetting my own imperfection has been one of my greatest flaws.
We are so fortunate that God is nothing like us humans. We are so unforgiving. Once we put a label on someone, as we very rarely remove it. In John 8:7 Jesus responds to the community who brought a woman forward to be stoned because she had been labelled promiscuous by saying “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” When Jesus said this He was looking down, when he looked up he found that only all the people had left, leaving Him and the woman alone. Not one of them could claim innocence.
Where were the men she had been committed her iniquities with? I wouldn’t be surprised if they were in the crowd demanding that she be stoned. Yes she was damaged. But what damaged her? Her sexual experiences or the constant judgement and condemnation she faced for the life she led? She was simply digging a hole in which she could place a piece of herself. Everyone who came along her path grabbed a shovel and helped her dig a hole big enough to bury her entire being. Not one of them asked her why she felt she needed to dig that hole in the first place.
I believe that no one is beyond redemption. No one is a write off. I pray for the girl who has been labelled. I pray that one day she will discover that her worth is defined by the God who created her. That she would know that even though society has discarded of her, He never will. As I grow, I pray that I would take the time to know the person behind the actions. That I would look beyond someone’s lifestyle and search their heart.
You may be damaged but your creator is the mechanic who knows what to do to restore you to your original condition. Stop looking for the quick-fix cheap alternatives they will not work. It will take some time but restoration is possible.
Damaged, but never beyond repair.